Improve Employee Motivation

You can't deny the fact that your organization works because of teamwork. The more the team works together harmoniously, the more successful your organization is. However, this is easier said than done. Many organizations fail because they are filled with unmotivated employees. If you have a problem with employee motivation, then take notice. A team that doesn't have employee motivation means that they have poor performance, which translates to bad business for you.

Improving the Motivation of Your Employees

- Build a good foundation at the start.
You improve motivation if you build a solid foundation at the beginning of your employee's career. Once the employee becomes a part of your organization, make sure that he is given an orientation of the history of your business and the mission and vision. Be aware also of his career expectations and goals and how you can make them feel as part of your team.

- Promote a positive environment in your organization.

A positive environment can always promote a positive outlook among employees. This means that you do not have preference over your other employees and you make all your employees feel important. Try to keep your doors open to all your staff, that they can approach you with problems and issues.

- Lead by example.

As a leader, you must lead by example. If you want your employees to come to work on time, then you should do the same. You communicate to your employees the things that you want by leading a good example and not simply talking about it.

- Make sure that your employees have a career path.

Employees always aim for career advancements and possibilities of promotion always improve employee motivation. You can work with your employees in charting their career growth plan taking into consideration their current skills and future goals. You will see how this would create magic among your employees' self-esteem.

- Be liberal with seminars and trainings.

You motivate your employees when you provide means to increase their professional skills through seminars and trainings. If there are possibilities of attending workshops and seminars related to your business, then offer these to them. If the employees feel that you are investing in them, they would feel cherished and would eventually improve their job performance.

- Let your employees have fun.

All work and no fun would make Jack a dull boy. Once in a while, engage your staff in fun activities together like annual excursions or dinner out for some job well done. If it's possible, you can reward your staff with an unexpected day off or early closing in a Friday.

- Offer incentives to the good worker

Offering incentives is a way of acknowledging a job well done. This can be in cash or in kind. Aside from the usual praise, you can offer small tokens of appreciation like gift certificates or performance-based bonuses.

- Be true to your promises.

Stick to your promises and your employees will feel motivated all the time. If they see that the people leading them are doing what has been promised, they would realize that they are working with a credible company and that they are lucky to be part of it. Remember that not keeping your promises would only translate to a decrease in employee motivation and eventual loss of trust.

There are many ways to improve employee motivation in your organization. All in all, it is all about being people-oriented and not losing sight of the fact that you need your staff to make your business successful.

Learn how to map out your path to success with comprehensive tools and guides to get your life back on track. Discover how to more effectively obtain personal, career or business goals and learn how to stay motivated right to the end

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Getting Comfortable With Change: 5 Easy Steps

"Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change." - Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

When something happens to you that might be labeled as negative, how do you react? The initial reaction for most of us is to run or hide, look for someone to blame, come up with excuses, wonder what we could have done differently, shift into a fear mode or do all of the above.

Whether the situation revolves around health issues, finances, work or relationships, the tendency is to dwell in the past or worry about the future. When we have one foot in the past and one foot in the future, it leaves nothing for the present! We spend our time, fearfully saying "What if .... happens?" And it's this focus on the future that causes feelings of fear and anxiety.

Here's a quote from The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle that applies to this topic: "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry - all forms of fear - are caused by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence."

Fear-based thinking is widespread in our society; fear of failure, of rejection, of poverty, of the unknown and of death. If we were to sum all this up in one word - it would be fear of change. We fear change because it takes away our feeling of security. So how is the best way to handle change, deal with so called negative circumstances and banish fear? There are five things you can do:

1. Practice gratitude. Make a list of all the things for which you are grateful. Doing this practice attracts more positive things into your life. Add to your list everyday.

2. Put both feet in the present! When you catch your mind drifting in to the past or the future, gently bring it back to the present moment. Put your attention on where you are NOW. Get quiet and ask your inner guidance for clarity and direction.

3. Accentuate the positive. Look for the opportunity in the situation. Drop negative words like not and don't. So rather than say, "I don't want to be broke", say "I want to be financially secure" or better still say " I am financially secure" or best ask, "In what ways, am I financially secure?"

4. Create a clear vision of what you want. Imagine it happening and experience the feeling of what it would be like to live your vision.

5. Let go of the outcome. Clinging too tightly to a particular outcome limits other possibilities . Know that following the previous four steps is attracting what you want, so just relax!

Following these five steps takes practice and diligence. It is natural to slip back into old patterns when unexpected events happen - that's okay. Just shift your thinking to these new steps when you catch yourself staddling the past and the future. You'll know when this happens because your body will tell you with various reactions!

Copyright October 2005

As a Life Transition Coach I work with clients to identify what's most important to them and to prioritize around these values. I help my clients identify and remove obstacles in the way and bring clarity and focus to their dreams. What is your dream? Are you undergoing a major transition and not clear where to turn? Call (972-306-4489) or email me, (coach.v.miller@verizon.net), to set up a complimentary, no obligation 30 minute telephone coaching session. Download my FREE e-Book, 12 Fun Ways to Change Your Life, or sign up for my FREE monthly newsletter at http://www.thrivingthroughchange.com

Feng Shui and Symbols - What You Have in Your House Says a Lot About You

What does a broken statue of a rooster have to do with Feng Shui? Feng Shui teaches us that everything in our house is a reflection of what is in our mind. Symbolically speaking, your house and the things in it reflects your thoughts, feelings, and spirit.

So let's get back to that rooster. One of my clients had recently separated from her husband. I noticed that a statue of a large bird was directly facing her bed, so it was probably the first thing she saw when getting up in the morning. Upon closer examination, I noticed two things; first, one of the legs had previously been broken and was wrapped in what appeared to be a cast. Second, I realized that it was not a chicken; it was a rooster. Unfortunately, the coxcomb on the top of the head had broken off, probably in the same fall that broke the leg of the statue.

I examined this unfortunate art piece for a moment and then said to my client, "Do you realize that the first thing you see in the morning is a broken cock?"

After I picked her up from the floor (she was laughing so much she just collapsed), she gasped out, "You have no idea of how perfect that observation is." Not wanting to really know much more, I suggested we send out the broken rooster for repair. We then talked about what she really wanted to see first thing in the morning; it was her flute and music and a picture of her daughter.

Another client was having a hard time keeping relationships with men going. Visiting her apartment was like seeing a shrine to her daughter. Everywhere was a mother/daughter photograph. It felt like she was already in a relationship and there was no room for any other one to grow.

Everything that you choose to surround yourself with has symbolic meaning and reflects something about your life. Whether intentional or not, all those objects, pictures, photographs, and pieces of furniture resonate with information about you. Take a look around at your house. What is the first thing you see when you enter your home? When you get up in the morning? When you sit down to eat? Do those objects support you in living your best life? Observe what you have around you and then experiment. See how you feel swapping out the images that surround you for other ones that are a better reflection of who you are and where you want to go. I've seen this simple action do amazing things to improve people's lives.

Interested in learning more about Feng Shui and ways to improve the energy in your home or office? Get great tips and motivating messages by subscribing to the Empty Your Nest newsletter at http://www.emptyyournest.com

How Do We Interpret Things?

With lot of things or events happening around us on a daily basis, we start believing that events control our lives and our environment has shaped who we are today. Right? No. . . wrong! It is not the events that shape up our lives, but our beliefs as to what those events mean to us. Take for example, two children born of the same father. where father is an alcoholic, drug addict, bitter and cruel who killed a liquor store cashier. One of his son turned out exactly like him. Where as his brother has a totally different story. . . a man raising three kids, happily married, working as a general manager for a blue chip company, finds work both challenging and rewarding. How these two people turned out to be totally different from each other, in spite of having grown up in the same environment?

When both were asked privately about this. . . they had the same answer. . . "What else could I have become with a father like that?"

Similarly, two women turning 70, each take a different meaning from the same event. One knows. . . that her life is coming to end. To her living seven decades means that her body must be breaking down and she did better be ready to exit from this game of life. The other woman decides that what a person is capable of doing at any age depends upon their beliefs and she sets a higher standard for herself. She decides that mountain climbing might be a good sport to begin at the age of 70!For the next 25 years, she devotes herself to this new adventure thus scaling some of the highest peaks of the world. Thus in her nineties, Hulda Crooks became the oldest woman to ascend Mount Fuji.

What I am trying to make a point here is. . . it is never the environment, it is never the events of our lives, but the meaning we derive from these events. . . how we interpret them, that shapes who we are today and who we will become tomorrow. So start giving the right meaning to the events of your life and make them memorable ones!

Get all motivational tips at Deepak.M's Self Development Zone Get all articles related to self improvement or self development at Self Development Zone.

Wishing For Riches - Self Help Tips

Anybody can wish for riches, and most people do, but only a few know that a definite plan, plus a burning desire for wealth, are the only dependable means of accumulating wealth.

This statement is at the beginning of Chapter 13 from the book "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill.

There are so many different methods, from so many different people, but most people don't know where to start, or plan their way to success.

I have heard some people mention the hardest part is actually starting, while others say you have to start somewhere, anywhere but start. Starting is usually the hardest part for most people, they get defeated by their own beliefs and of course never even start.

Fear of failure and fear of success, seem to be at the top of the list when thinking about starting a business. It's always been hard to imagine people being afraid to succeed, when this is what they seem to desire the most.

Wishing for riches can motivate you to start, thinking about the many different ways to succeed can motivate you to plan. A burning dire to succeed well often motivate you to start and create a plan eventually.

The key to creating wealth is developing habits and good daily habits performed over a lifetime, most of the time, will lead you to wealth beyond your wildest dream's. Sometimes this wealth is going to have nothing to do with money.

Get some books, talk to some people, watch some biographies about successful people throughout history, find out what they did and start paving your own trail. But you're going to have to start somewhere.

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing, marketing and personal development.

Greg is currently working on a video library filled with great movies on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world.

Everything That's Beautiful is Cracked, That's How the Light Gets In

What is beauty anyway?

The answer to that question seems to come at us everyday through magazines like; People, Chatelaine, Men's Health, Vogue, Hello, Esquire, newspapers, television shows like; Extreme Makeover, Entertainment Tonight, The Miss Universe Pageant, Access Hollywood and the advertisements that come with those publications and shows, that purport to know what beauty is. We seem to take for granted that the narrow, superficial societal definition of beauty is essentially related to physical appearance and attraction. But have you really stopped to ponder what beauty is, really?

Leonard Cohen; singer, songwriter, novelist and poet said that "everything that's beautiful is cracked, that's how the light gets in." I do believe he has captured the essence of beauty.

Beauty is in the nature of our flaws. It is in our reflective self-awareness and acceptance of our imperfections that we discover our true beauty. Once we begin to reach that level of maturity and self-esteem, approaching self-actualization, we increasingly behave and even radiate an inner goodness, grace and dignity, which becomes evident to the people around us. Acceptance of ourselves is eventually what leads us to becoming self-actualized. It allows us to transcend our imperfections, highlight and focus on our strengths and forge a life for ourselves and for those who we love in a congruent way with the essence of our being.

To translate; "that's how the light gets in," is meant to mean quite literally becoming "enlightened." When the light shines through the cracks in our outer armor rather than blinding us, it illuminates areas in our lives that we need to bring attention to. Those cracks or flaws are what often keeps us from achieving that level of esteem that all of us desire, whether we are consciously aware of them or not. We can do two things in relation to our imperfections, work to bring about change that will perhaps eliminate or minimize them or just come to accept them as a part of who we are in the world.

So, don't be afraid to let the light shine through the cracks, open up to it, bask in its warmth and glow, work with it to bring harmony to your life, find your true self then share it with the world.
I believe that in spite of the seemingly complex nature of our world today, our true self is actually love reflected. Become a positive force for good, it will make you feel better.

James Ladd
Your Personal Coach

JAMES LADD B.A., C.H.R.P., C.P.I.R. Life & Business Coach, author and speaker, who has without a doubt been down the "Road Less Traveled," having survived and thrived after a double lung transplant in August of 2003. Jim comes to this place in his incredible life journey with a dynamic combination of work and life experience. Jim worked as an Organizational & Human Resource Development Specialist for over 35 years in the private, public & non-profit sectors and also managed a provincial government employee assistance program serving over 15,000 employees. He has authored and facilitated a wide variety of training programs covering such diverse topics as; managing organizational change, conflict resolution, performance management, managing and/or coping with stress, interviewing & counseling skills, supervisory & management skills. His most recent publication titled; "THE PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION GUIDE: Raising Awareness of Self to Slay the Dragon," is available through his website. In the community he became an award winning football coach over the course of 25 years (Coach of the Year 3M of Canada, Coach of the Year, Developmental Category, Coaches Assoc. of Manitoba

How to Greatly Improve Your Manifestations

Chances you are familiar with: The Power of Intention, Think and Grow Rich, The Secret, The Law of Attraction, or Ask and it is Given. Let's face it, these methods for manifesting your desires into reality teach much of the same methods, through different angles.

What makes up their bulk of their messages (instead of focusing on the important mystic essentials for one to directly change reality to their will) are hours of self-help, spiritual inspiration, and tools for personal and inner transformation. May just be me, but that sounds like another subject matter. Yet supposedly these are the real issues behind your ability, or lack thereof. It boils down to surrendering negative thoughts, re-remembering positive elements of life, and going through self-therapy until the results in your life follow the changes in your outlook. Once you can hold a positive outlook, the petty psychology that fueled what manifested in your life until now, will fade away, replaced by positive changes. Some schools even use generalizations in quantum physics to support their methods. The bottom line is by changing your thoughts, you will change your reality.

Why then, is it so impossible to achieve for the mass majority!?

If you are like thousands of others, you may be thinking sure it sounds logical, but why (despite how much you understand positive thinking), behind all the applied optimism, does it feel like everything is still a luck of the draw situation? That much like a domino effect, your destiny seems to have been set in motion by cosmic dice thrown at the moment of your birth? Pretty fatalistic right? What if there was a way to alter those dominoes? That is what Manifesting or co-creating is all about right?

It doesn't matter how many authors out there can explain away the logic, it doesn't automatically make them qualified to teach how-to achieve it. Sure, in order to teach how, you must do so from experiential success, but the other side is understanding the mind-state (not just the intentions) of the student learning it. So let's get to the heart of this article.

Most people automate. They are not in control of their thoughts. Hindu yogi's call it the monkey mind. The Higher Balance Institute calls it your "Babbler". The bottom line is, if you don't know how to control it, then it won't matter how much you grasp, your brain will still play thoughts like a broken record. No matter how clearly you've traced where your negativity originated from in childhood, figuring that out will only change "the content" your babbler uses to dilute your focus while manifesting.

Put positive and negative aside. If your mind is undisciplined, your attempts at manifesting won't generate enough "fuel" or energy to alter the cosmic dominoes beyond your awareness. But, if you somehow had enough fuel to "broadcast" your intentions out to God or the Universe, call it what you will, I guarantee it would add the missing link!

So how can you build this kind of fuel? There are several easy ways. No, I'm not trying to trick you, they really are easy if you put one daily foot in front of the other.

1. Learn how to control your thoughts. Learn an effective meditation and make it a daily practice. Never mind enlightenment (for now), just train your thought control. (make sure it's not a mantra technique, you don't want any triggered spoken or structured thoughts at all) I highly recommend the methods that focus on a chakra. Once you can hold a state of "non-thought" for 1 minute, you are VERY close to your goal.

2. Use this new skill in your manifestation sessions. Relax into a clear state of "nonthought", and instead of a ton of babbled-thoughts representing your intention, or representing what you are asking God, you will use your new meditative skill to isolate the emotional texture (behind the words) of what it is you desire. It cuts to the chase and amplifies the fuel!

3. Hold that emotion! Focus solely on broadcasting the feeling to the universe. Then broadcast it to the deepest part of your heart and mind. Use this fuel technique to program yourself too. Our bodies are electrical, programmed from birth by reality itself. This works far better than spoken or 'babbled' affirmations.

Having more fuel makes all the difference. But if you still have an undisciplined mind, just forget about it. Sure, your desires have an emotional fuel in themselves, but if your mind can only last 5 seconds before another thought comes in diluting it, it basically just evaporated whatever fuel was building.

Train your non-thought skill. Use it to enhance your manifestations and achieve the success you know you've earned. That's Direct Manifestation!

Matt Struve

Higher Balance Institute offers tools for meditation, spiritual development, enhanced intuition and sensory awareness in the world. Our mission is simple - to awaken the world one mind at a time. For more information and a free 1 hour Q&A Audio recording on Manifestation visit us at http://www.higherbalance.com

Spending My Childhood Around Christians

I was born in the 1960s and raised in Southern California, United States of America. During that period of time, and in the area I was raised, there was basically one religion that dominated every aspect of mine and my friends lives. That religion was Christianity. When I was in elementary school, I knew one Jewish boy and he looked different than the Christians and even talk different. He was very smart and spent a lot of his time reading, instead of playing at recess.

There were no Muslims or Hindus and it was a predominantly white environment. The first black students I seen was when I entered the eighth grade and by the time I finished high school, I could count all of the black students I had met on both of my hands. So now you have a pretty good idea of my life, living in a white neighborhood that was 90% Christian.

As you can guessed it, I was raised a Christian, but not a regular Christian, I was a Methodist and proud of it, until my parents got tired of the church elders asking for money or if my father could help build the new church. My father explained to them, that he needed to work to support his family and could only contribute, what ever he could to the church and no more. They were very unhappy and made it uncomfortable for us to go to the church anymore.

Hard to imagine, isn't it. Christians asking for money and then when they don't receive it, getting mad at one of their brethren.

Well it was time to switch churches and we are now going to the Crystal Cathedral Church in Garden Grove California. These people had everything and it was a large church. This was before they built the massive glass structure that is presently the church sanctuary. I enjoy going to this church, because we didn't have to go to Sunday school and got to sit with the adults to worship.

By the time I was 15, neither one of my parents were going to church anymore and my life didn't seem to change that much, even though I prayed every night with my brother. Maybe that was it, I didn't have to go to church as long as I prayed every night... By the time I was 18 years old, I was more confused about organized religion than ever before and this included Christianity.

How can someone kill in the name of God? The Muslims were doing it, the Christians were doing it, the Muslims were fighting the Hindus in India and it all seemed normal. It didn't seem normal to me, when I was supposed to love my neighbor and live a life like Christ who never seemed to start fights or even get mad. Maybe a couple of times, over some money, in the Temple.

I have chosen not to be a part of organized religion. I'd figured out that most of our religious beliefs came from our upbringing. This seems to have brainwashed us into believing we are better because were right and know for a fact, that we have chosen to belong to the right religion. What if were not right?

I want to ask you a question, do you think that other religions are wrong and yours is right? If you really spend some time and think about this, you will see, that your religion is not that different than someone else's and neither was their upbringing. Most religious followers, belonged to the religion of their childhood.

Who Is Jesus?

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Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing and personal development.

Greg is currently working on a spiritual videos filled with great movies on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world.

Crispin the Cross of Lead - Book Review

Newbery Medal winner of 2003, Crispin The Cross of Lead is an action packed historical novel set in the 1380's of England's peasant revolt. The protagonist is a thirteen year old peasant boy known only as "Asta's Son" (Asta being the boys mother) because he has never been called by his own name. In fact he doesn't know he has a name until his mother dies. The village priest discloses he baptized him and gave him the Christian name of Crispin.

Also, after Crispin's mother dies the only home he has ever known is burned to the ground. Crispin is forced to begin his life as a fugitive for thievery and murder. He is declared a "wolf's head" by the corrupt steward John Aycliffe, for crimes he didn't commit. This means that anyone can kill him like a common animal and collect a sizeable reward.

Feudalism is the way of life for many in 14th century England. There are countless taxes that lowly peasants must pay and constant violence. People were either very poor or very rich. Common people had no say over their destiny. The church is unable to protect parishioners and subject to many cruelties.

"Time was the great millstone, which ground us to dust like kerneled wheat. The Holy Church told us where we were in the alterations of the day, the year, and in our daily toil. Birth and death alone gave distinction to our lives, as we made the journey between the darkness from whence we had come to the darkness where we were fated to await Judgment Day."

There are plenty of chase scenes as well as undisclosed plans shrouded in mystery. Avi develops a couple of compelling characters but Bear, a traveling juggler, will become Crispin's deliverance from the bounty hunters that follow them everywhere. The relationship between the juggler and the peasant become the heart of the story.

Learn more about children's writing tips and award winning book reviews by visiting Carma's Window at http://carmaswindow.blogspot.com Download the free EBook, "Unite to Write," a compilation of thirteen top expert authors as read on Ezine article directory and "Free Tips on Freelance Writing."

Chosing Misery Over Happiness

I am not one to feel sorry for most people. They seem to have a unique ability to cause themselves the most damage during certain parts of their lives. I have met some pretty self destructive people in my life. Being raised by a mother that lived in misery and love.

My mother had a difficult childhood. It seemed as if every corner she turned there was a obstacle either right in front of here or waiting just around the corner. Her father died when she was 12 year old. He was a farm laborer and didn't make much money. In other words they were poor...... She got sent to live with a few foster families and according to her she was molested by one of the fathers she lived with.

Soon her older sister invited her to live with her. My aunt was married to the owner of a pottery business and had 2 children about 10 years younger than my mother. My aunt soon realized she had a live in baby sitter that allowed her to stay out drinking most of the day.

My Uncle was what you would call a drunk back then, now we call these people alcoholics. Well any way I think you are starting to get a picture of my mothers life up to this point. It is probably safe to assume that this isn't the ideal life for a young woman.

The next event to happen in my moms life was for my uncle to fall in the shower one night after tying one on that night. He died soon after but my aunt seemed to make a another good choice and ended up marring the owner of the bar that they spent most of their time in.
The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. Allan K. Chalmers

By this time my mom was in High School and met my future father. It wasn't exactly a marriage made in heaven. My dad was always an easy going man. He seemed to let most stuff go in one ear and out the other.

As you guessed it they had a few children. Nice one Dad and Mom. According to the books I have read on Angelic beings. People that believe in the after life and angels. They tell me I had a choice and was able to choose my parents....... What was I thinking...... I should have choose someone with some money and a couple of parents that were deeply in love .

How did I end up here in this situation.

I ended up loving my parents like most of us. They seemed to be doing the best that they could possibly do raising me, my bother and my sister. My mom and dad ended up getting a divorce and I went to live with my father.

My Father is remarried to a wonderful woman that seems to bring him a lot of happiness.
I haven't seen my mother for a while now. She lives with a life of excuses and misery. Her childhood was not the greatest but that doesn't give her the right to bring misery into other peoples lives. She has made a conscious choice to live what seems to be a painful life. Maybe her choices in life have made me choose happiness over misery.

I have always wondered what it is that motivates someone to live a life of true unhappiness when it takes the same amount of energy to live a life of joy. Life is meant to be full of joy and happiness so start today by making the right choices to live a fulfilling life of happiness.

If you are reading this and can't make up your mind what kind of life you truly want to live visit me at http://live.spiritualideas.com/ . Change your thinking and change your life.

Greg Vanden Berge will help you create a new approach to life and discover talents you never knew you had. We can help you get the most out of yourself all the time. Start developing your innate strengths and abilities to start enriching your life TODAY !

Set Goals Without Limits

Everybody on this planet has the ability to dream. But what exactly is a dream? The Websters Dictionary offers sixteen definitions of the word dream, but here we will only list two.

1. A succession of thoughts, images, or emotions passing through the mind during sleep.

2. A vision voluntarily indulged in while awake; daydream; reverie.

Whether we remember them or not we all have dreams while we sleep. But for the most part our dreaming occurs while we are awake. What are your dreams? Do you dream of making more money at your current job or do you dream of owning the company? Do you dream of owning your own home with a white picket fence or do you dream of owning your own ocean front estate on a tropical island with your own private beach? Maybe it's your dream to become president of your country or to become a motivational speaker and help millions of other people to realize their dreams. Whatever your dreams, the only thing stopping you from achieving them are the limits that you set up in your own mind.

This may seem difficult to believe but the only person that can stop you from attaining all that you desire is YOU! All the power and ability you would ever need to make your wildest dreams come true already resides within you. Inside your head is the key to ultimate success. Your mind is a vast source of energy that can never be fully consumed. The problem is that most people never learn how to direct this energy to create the lives they desire.

Dreaming, in and of itself is not enough. You must create a dream big enough to keep your interest, turn it into a goal, and in turn transform that goal into a burning desire. Anything short of that is a waste of your time and effort.

Goal Setting:

1. You must decide what you want and must absolutely have. Remember to make your goal big enough to keep you excited about accomplishing it. Nothing is impossible unless you believe it is!

2. Determine where you are now in relation to reaching your goal.

3. Once you know where you are, you need to determine what steps are necessary to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be. This will act much like a map on your journey to success.

4. Chart all this information down on paper. This step is absolutely necessary. Writing down your goal on paper is the first step to transforming your vision into its physical equivalent.

5. Review your written goal various times throughout the day. As you do this, try to imagine already having achieved your goal. Visualize yourself in possession of that which you want most, or of the person you will be in the future as if it were right now. Perform this step until your goal becomes a burning desire. Once you reach this point, doubt about your ability to succeed will fade away, and the vast source of energy which your mind contains will now back you in your effort to achieve.

Visit http://www.inspirationtochange.com for life improving resources!

What Makes A Great Presenter?

Every day millions of people around the world make a presentation. Yet most of us who have been to meetings know that very few of those people are truly great. At each meeting there is usually only one person who stands out head and shoulders above the rest as someone who really connects with us in the audience. The truth is, most presenters are just plain average and quite a few are simply dreadful. So, how can you move from being a run of the mill presenter to being fantastic?

Every one of us has the ability to be truly great as a presenter. There is nothing particularly special about the people who stand out as brilliant. However, the average presenter is usually holding themselves back, doing things which prevent them from being good.

At every training course run by The Presentation Business we spend some time debating what makes a great presenter. This inevitably leads to a discussion of what the bad presenters do wrong. Having kept a record of what these sessions considered I have been able to produce a definitive list of what to do to make your presentations great.

The overwhelming conclusion of all these discussions is: content is NOT important. Of the hundreds of people who have debated what makes a great presenter not a single person has mentioned the value of the content. Your audiences are likely to think in just the same way. They are NOT interested in what you are saying, but the way you are saying it. If you say it well, that appears to make the content interesting. But what this means is, if you concentrate your planning and preparation on content, you are likely only to be average.

The most important factor for great presenters according to our discussions is that they make a personal connection to every member of the audience. This means lots of eye contact, liberal use of the words I and you, and that everything you deliver is done form the audiences perspective. This means you need to know a great deal about your audience in advance so you can do this.

The connection you make between yourself and your audience seems to be enhanced by the widespread use of examples. Our discussions at training courses show that your audience expects you to show rather than tell. In other words, you dont need to give them messages and content; instead you need to give them lots of examples and they will work out the message for themselves.

A further element of this aspect of being a great presenter is that these examples should always include you. Your audience wants to know about your thoughts, your feelings and your opinions. They want to share your experiences. If all you deliver is content, this does not help your audience. They could get your content from a book, a web site or some other non human contact. The fact that you are presenting to them means your audience wants to hear from you personally.

Your audience also wants you to be a living person. They dont want to hear from a statue. In other words you need to be active. The discussions held at our training courses show time and time again that presenters who move are the one who gain the most attention. If you think about this, it is quite understandable. In social situations we are active we use gestures, we move our bodies and change posture. To avoid doing so when presenting makes you look abnormal and this serves to disconnect you. There is also a big advantage to moving it helps reduce nerves when presenting.

As well as moving to be natural, our discussions show that great presenters are interactive. They ask questions, they involve the audience and essentially they treat the presentation as a conversation. This helps boost the connection between themselves and the audience. Thats because for the audience the interactivity appears normal, whereas being spoken at for a great length of time does not.

Another important aspect of making your presentation appear normal is that your audience expects you to deliver your material without any prompts. Conversations do not need notes! Hence your presentation will benefit from appearing normal if you do not use notes or any prompts of any kind including bullet points on slides. Discussions at our training sessions show time and time again that audiences do not like presenters who use notes, prompt cards, bullet point slides or any other form of memory jogger. Audiences expect presenters to know their stuff. Great presenters never use notes.

An extension of the lack of notes concept is that great presenters talk from the heart. They are passionate about their subject and they are emotional. The dispassionate, business-like presenter is one of the most disliked, according to our discussions. What this means is that you should talk less about your subject and much more about your experiences as this will help boost your passion.

Our training sessions also reveal that audiences want to have fun. They want to see you enjoying yourself and they want to have a laugh. This does not mean you need to tell jokes, but it does mean your audiences expect you to be light. Even for serious subjects it seems that audiences expect some kind of lightness. They want humour and they want you to smile. Straight faced, dry presenters are particularly disliked by audiences.

One final aspect that is revealed by the discussions at our training sessions and that is everyone in your audience expects the presenter to motivate them. This does not mean you need to be a motivational speaker. Rather what it means is that your audience is expecting you to tell them what to do. Your audience does not expect a presenter simply to deliver information they can get that from a book or a web site. Instead great presenters give audiences some action to take.

All of these discussion points suggest that those presenters who treat their presentation as a conversation who just have a chat with the audience are the ones marked out as truly great. People who give presentations by delivering content are seen as boring and uninteresting. This also means their messages are not conveyed, so they may as well not be presenting in the first place.

Oh, and one final thing. Our discussions show that audiences simply detest the use of computerised slides. They just want to hear from you. Truly great presenters therefore do one other vital thing they switch off the projector!

Graham Jones runs The Presentation Business at http://www.presentationbiz.com which specialises in helping people become great public speakers.

Strategies for Surviving the Pit of Life

Does it seem as if life has presented you with situations where you have been knocked down and knocked around? Are you facing a barrage of obstacles, challenges, issues, and problems? Do you feel as if youve been knocked into a pit?

I define the pit as a state of being in which you feel helpless, hopeless and unable to succeed. Your energy is low, your actions are stagnant, and your faith is weak. Overall, you lack the ability to motivate yourself to take action.

I have found that once you fall in the pit, it is sometimes hard to come out. You struggle and cant get a grip. You slip, you slide, you fall flat on your face. Worse yet, you feel as if you cant see, and there seems to be no one around to help.

What I have come to realize, however, is that self-motivation is one of the most crucial resources to surviving the challenges of life. Self-motivation is when you can see beyond your current situation in order to move yourself into action.

Even though we all have self-motivation as a tool to increase our chances of avoiding lifes pitfalls, I have observed that there are those of us that find it extremely hard to remain motivated in living life daily. And worse yet, Ive realized that there are some who completely rely upon other people to motivate them.

No matter what life has tricked you into believing about yourself, understand that you must motivate yourself! When you are knocked down by the challenges of life, know that you are your greatest resource to getting back up again!

Here are five (5) strategies that I developed which will help you to remain motivated to climb out your pit:

Put on your Rhinestone Combat Boots: Put your foot down, take a stand and declare, Enough is enough! Feel good about yourself as you wear the knowledge, experiences, wisdom, and faith that will help you to fight battles, climb over challenges, and kick butt.

Focus on the Light: You must realize that your success depends on you believing in yourself and pushing beyond what you see. You must learn to focus on what lies ahead (i.e. job promotion, SBA loan, keys to your new home) and not dwell on what has passed (i.e. layoff, bankruptcy, divorce).

Grasp Again: Learn that when you slip in grasping for something that you want, that break gives you a chance to take a breath, regain your strength, and renew your focus, allowing you to see the best way to grasp again. As my favorite singer, Aaliyah, once sang, if at first you dont succeed, dust yourself off and try again, you can dust it off and try again, try again. Meaning, keep grasping until you get a firm hold and can overcome your obstacles.

Have a Flashback Party: Get together with a group of your closest friends. Allow those who know you well to shed light on the areas where you are great. You will gain strength as the memories reveal your achievements, successes, and moments of fearlessness. The flashback party will add to your self-confidence and boost your self-esteem and give you the energy to fight the darkness.

Sing a Tune: Singing a tune of positive words will uplift, encourage and motivate you to put forth your best effort to overcome the challenges of your life. Quotes, words of praise, affirmations, and scriptures are examples of positive tunes that you must play in your mind over and over again as you experience your darkest moments.

Success in life does require you to receive guidance, direction and assistance from others. Yet, the vital key to remaining out of and moving beyond the pit requires that you serve as the motivating force of your own life. When you Put on your Rhinestone Combat Boots, Focus on the Light, Grasp Again, Have a Flashback Party, and Sing a Tune, your actions will develop you into a capable individual who is wise and strong enough to overcome the challenges life throws your way.

Copyright @ 2007 SSANEE, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Cassandra Lee is a self-development expert that conducts seminars, moderates panels, facilitates workshops, presents speeches, and writes resources that provides instructions on personal growth and professional success. She is founder, president and chief executive officer of SSANEE Incorporated, an educational consulting firm in Chicago, IL, where she provides interactive, skill-building seminars and keynotes to associations, colleges, corporations, clubs, organizations, social service agencies, and universities nationwide. She is featured in Whos Who in Black Chicago, the Inaugural Edition and is the author of the audio CD D.I.V.A.BITS: 24 Enlightening Tips to Conquer Communication Skills and co-author of the books Survival Skills for the African-American Woman and The Young Womans Guide for Personal Success. To receive professional development strategies FREE each month, sign-up for her newsletter, Dialog Digest at http://www.ssanee.com

When Nobody Believes in You - Self Help Tips

Maybe one of the most distressing experiences people can encounter is that of being rejected by the people who should be supporting them. Although human beings are intrinsically social and gregarious, there are moments when the community we live in does not fulfill its role of reinforcement it is supposed to have. It is then when people have to deal with feelings of exclusion and loneliness.

When these feelings of rejection are not appropriately dealt with, they have a paralyzing effect on the personal growth of the affected person. Lack of self-esteem and boldness will inevitably lead to a life of failure and underachievement.

If you are struggling in this area, here are some powerful thoughts that will help you confront those feelings of loneliness and rejection successfully:

Don't Rely on Homo sapiens

• Most people who think that nobody believes in them judge by the actions of the people around them. Just because people seem to ignore you doesn't mean they don't believe in you. If you are constantly expecting other people to meet your needs of reassurance, you're destined to a life of disappointment.
• Don't have too high expectations for people investing time in you. Remember that we live in a fast paced world. Most people, even our loved ones, don't always take time to meet all the needs around them, unless they scream in their face.
• Human beings are selfish by nature. Most people are so busy with their own troubles that they don't notice when somebody around them could need a bit of encouragement.
• You'd be surprised to find how many people around you are probably hurting just as much as you are. Take the first step and sow love and care into another life without expecting anything in return. If you sow love, you will definitely reap love.

Rely on God Instead

• Jesus knows exactly how you feel. He too was rejected and even killed by his contemporaries, yet He walked in a life that always pleased His Father, regardless of what people thought. And His life caused a global impact on the history of mankind.
• God also has a perfect plan for you. He has designed you with a unique combination of gifts and talents to accomplish the task you have been given. He loves you and believes in you. And He promised to never forsake you if you chose to walk with Him.

If you are struggling with feelings of loneliness, rejection or lack of self-esteem, I want to invite you to find a new meaning for your life. Go to http://www.Self-DirectedLearningForSuccess.com and get immediate access to my free e-course "7 Steps to Consistently Change Your Life" and my free e-book that will help you develop your God-given talents to find and fulfill your purpose in life.

From Bettina Langerfeldt, who teaches people how to pursue their God-given gifts and talents by designing their own education with self-directed learning.

2008 Freedompioneer

Book Review: Godcountry

Godcountry by Colleen Drippe
Novel Books, Inc., 1591050022, $5.50

Eduardo Sabat was once a slave. Because he does not know the codes which will remove it, he still wears the shackle-like bracelet that once bound him to servitude in a pagan land, and which continues to remind him of his past. Though first instinct for a freed man would be to distance himself as far as possible from the place of slavery, it is not Eduardo's instinct. Now a for-hire mercenary partnered with the hardy Otto Zeller, Eduardo willingly treks back into the desolate colony called Godcountry, motivated by the job but not entirely aware of the consequences.

While the risks involved in returning to Godcountry are given, Eduardo is surprised by the attempts to foil his mission of returning the captured Hermadon Pelanot - son of the colony of Hithia's leader - to the custody of his stern aunt. His estranged wife is mysteriously murdered, and soon attempts on his own life follow. Nevertheless, Eduardo presses onward with the help of a motley party which includes the devout Christian Wolfbane and a crew of interplanetary religious known as the Star Brothers, whose faith gives Eduardo something to ponder as he discovers the threat to his life is closer than he actually realizes.

Godcountry is hard science fiction blended nicely with elements of faith and humanity. This story of a bleak future plagued by religious persecution and interplanetary greed bolstered through human slavery doesn't offer an immediate resolution to any problems, but offers the reader an intense look at how faith can exist in a hostile society and therefore offer a future of hope.

Kathryn Lively is the publisher of Phaze, romance novels in eBook and paperback. She offers book promotion advice for authors.

Religious Views Based From Fear

I was told by an advertising executive one day that all of your advertisements need to deliver some sort of hope for the people you're trying to persuade into buying your products. Funny, if you think about it, I got some and great advice about life from someone in the advertisement business.

Most people are looking for hope, in everything they do. Most of our daily activities revolve around hope and this gives our lives some sort of direction. If you believe in an almighty being and creator of the universe, often you will try to please him, ....or her, ....or it, in hopes of entering the kingdom of heaven or the promised land after you die.

Often our fears will increase our levels of hoping, the fear of doing something against your religion can often inspire you to become a more spiritual person, a good and moral person. Fear of making the wrong choices will inspire us to make better, moral choices, all for the sake of acquiring a ticket to Heaven or Nirvana. You're hoping, your good deeds on earth will earn you a place in heaven.

Most people are afraid of dying and leaving this world, for good. They don't know where they're going and that seems to scare most people. If we can offer someone a little hope, that they are going to a much better place than here, we can often ease the pain and suffering associated with death. I have to admit, most religions of the world promise another world, after we're done with this one.

If you're living a honest and moral life with the hopes of living a bountiful life in heaven, could you be wrong. What if you're seeking Hope in the wrong religion? If you're a Christian and the Hindus are right and you're wrong, do you get to enter there eternal kingdom.

Think about this question, I'm about to ask you. What if spend your whole life studying your religion and it's wrong? There is no heaven and when you die, that's the end of your existence

Have you ever wondered why you believe in your religion and someone in another country or even a couple of miles away believes in something entirely different.

Don't get mad at me or yourself, simply think about the question for a while, this question has transformed my life and put me on a wonderful spiritual path of learning.

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development. Check out one of his recommended books, The Power of Intention

If you want to read something funny and get your daily laugh in, you need to read this, it's funny Using Religion Responsibility. It's based on overindulgence.

How to Easily Cure Any Addiction Or Phobia With Self Help Hypnosis and Mind Control Techniques

Self Help Hypnosis can be used to very effectively help you with a number of problems that you are experiencing in your daily life. By using mind control techniques and self hypnosis audio you will be able to alleviate phobias, addictions or any kind of social problems you may be experiencing. The process of self hypnosis has many kinds of advantages.

Its an effective way to plants ideas and suggestions into your subconscious mind that will have a great influence over the actions in your daily life. You will be able to re-train your mind to steer away from negative behaviors. Just think about all you could achieve by using these effective mind control techniques.

Self hypnosis can help you with:

Curing phobias such as fear of heights, fear of the dentist, social phobias or any other situation where you feel vulnerable.

Easier to overcome addictions such as smoking, or help you to lose weight or any other things you need help with to stop doing, but where your mind powers are lacking.

Hypnotize yourself and get those hours of sleep you desperately need. Your Insomnia problems will be a thing of the past.

Learn how to train your mind to relieve stress, tension, worry or anything that is painful in your life

So as you can see there is many benefits of using Self Help Hypnosis. These mind control techniques will be bring an enormous positive experience to your daily life. Using self hypnosis audio you can achieve the results you seek while resting comfortably in your sofa.

If You want to find a Solution to your problem Right Now, all you need to do is Click HERE

Visit This Online Hypnosis Site that offers a ton a resources on anything hypnosis related. Dont wait for the solution to your problems when you can get the answers right now!

Discover How to Gain Self Confidence and Improve Yourself With Easy Methods You Can Do Right Now!

Many people don't have any idea about how to gain self confidence. All of us have our flaws in place. However, we are also useful each in our own way. Therefore, if there is anyone around you who is trying to make you feel useless, then immediately state otherwise. You need to be confident of yourself before exuding it to others.

The more you listen to others who place restrictions on your capabilities the more you start to believe in the impossibility of things. The main thing about how to gain self confidence is to believe that you can do anything you put your mind to if you want to.

Think well about yourself. Be rational about your success and don't blow your failures out of proportion. We all have our good times, and we have our bad times. A confident person will take the good times as it comes and will handle the bad times with much more ease.

If you don't take care of your self confidence you will be stuck in a never ending cycle of low self esteem and depression. Your opinion of yourself will be low at all times. You will never realize your potential. Therefore, it is important to be around people who will boost your confidence and fill your mind with positive thoughts. Stay away from discouraging or intimidating people.

The pursuit of self confidence must come from within. Unless you want to change that about yourself, no one else can. But with the right techniques and tools you can accomplish amazing results.

If you want to discover how to gain self confidence and improve yourself in other areas in your life, check out my review of some of the most effective Self Confidence Boosters available.

Read my Quantum Mind Power Review To Find out More about this powerful program. You dont want to miss out on this Amazing Secret when you can solve your problems Today!

Beyond Motivation and Passion

It seems that just as we shifted paradigms in the eighties, we worked synergistically in the nineties; now we are passionate in the naughties. Even my local petrol station has passion brochures at the pump! So what are we passionate for ?

Last October I got some unasked for, but expert, advice from an extreme extrovert to be more passionate. After I had calmed down, I took a long hard look at what I was doing and seriously questioned my passion level. This was after all, expert advice.

My research took me through a motley assortment of superficial pop psychology and self help books, all with Passion in the title and each more inane than the last. Finally I stumbled across a book by Sydney author Peter Wallman, The Wisdom of Passion. He appeared to get to the real core of what Passion is, and after meeting with him I was convinced that he had identified a simple but powerful process for identifying and capturing our core passions. I loved the simplicity of the process and the clarity it brought to me and my business. Now I assist others to identify what it is that gets their juices flowing.

Along the way through research, self analysis and questioning of my clients and others who have Passion Mapped I have identified some keys to passion.

Passion is very personal and unique to the individual.

Most of our strongest passions are kept internalised and rarely expressed outwardly.

The most powerful passions are not material (or sport).

Connecting strongly with our passions creates a magnetic effect We attract people and opportunities.

Eliciting deep passions requires skill, we have learned well from the school of hard knocks to keep this side of ourselves hidden.

When we express our passion, our voices change, our eyes sparkle, and our physical demeanor shifts.

Passion is contagious be very careful.

Passion comes before motivation and way before action.

Passion makes a difference.

I share my story of being told to be more passionate with colleagues and clients and generally get snorts of bemusement. As an introvert, I am not given to bounding into a room, leaping in the air, giving great shouts, or jumping up and down on a sofa Oprahs or anyone elses. So how do I express Passion? Tell me after you talk to me!!!

Passion is not something you have more (or less) of. Passion is inherent and intrinsic.

Last week I had the opportunity to coach 10 leaders and staff members of a niche organisation during three intense days.
Each of these individuals has a determination and a spark in their eyes, a tone of voice and a body posture which unmistakably conveys the depth of their passion about the work they do. Unsurprisingly, the organisations Director is passionately leading from the front - a true visionary leader. I felt honoured and very humbled to be coaching this particular team. Their common focus and harnessed energy, steered by their Director, is making a huge difference to their client base. Truly a high impact and passion based organisation.

One of our tasks as leaders is to uncover and unleash the hidden power of Passion in our employees, to harness and direct this passion towards a common shared goal. Just imagine, if you will, for a moment what your team could achieve this year if they were as passionately involved and focused as the organisation I mentioned earlier.

Kofi Annan said To live is to choose. But to choose, you must know who you are and what you stand for, where you want to go, and why you want to get there.
In business our Mission and Values statements spell out who we are and what we stand for, Our Vision statement gives where we want to go, and our Strategy gives us the how. But the why is missing.

Passion is the why!!

Liz Cassidy, founder of Third Sigma International is an author, Speaker, Trainer and Executive Coach and is passionate about facilitating results in the businesses, professional and personal lives of her clients. For more information http://www.thirdsigma.com.au

Eye Contact - Non-verbal Communication, A Tool In Stopping Bullies

This past week I was presenting my Core Democratic Values program at a school in Detroit, MI. There is a part in the program where I pick twelve students to help me to demonstrate the first three articles of the Constitution. The last young lady I asked up was sitting in the middle of the second row. She was so excited that I picked her she jumped up from her seat. As she was trying to walk over to the center aisle three boys grabbed her pantleg and tried to trip her. She caught her balance and gave all
three of those boys a stare that would scare a bear. The boys giggling faces quickly turned to fear. They bowed their headsdown as if they were being scold by the principal.

The best thing we can teach our students and children is that
we don't have to say anything to get the point across. In a great book entitled Bully-Proofing Your School the authors talk about "getting the meaning without words" (P.67) It's all about body language.
If we are giving the bully firm eye contact we can effectively send out a non-verbal message that clearly means "KNOCK IT OFF!".

"Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power" Seneca

I am sure you have held a conversation with another person who
is unable to look you in the eyes when talking or listening to you. My wife and I were discussing this article and she mentioned how some people even close their eyes when they talk. Eye contact
demonstrates self-confidence and self-esteem. Dan Olweus author of Bullying at School and one of the Godfathers of anti-bullying issues writes," the typical victims are more anxious and insecure
than students in general." Eye contact in my opinion is one of the best ways to demonstrate security and self-control. It an easy non-violent assertive tools available to the victims of a
bully. As a professional speaker, I have been taught to give eye contact to my audience but not to exceed more than three to five seconds so they don't feel intimidated. Think about when you were
caught doing something you weren't supposed to be doing. Remember how your teacher or parent looked you directly in the eyes and how scary it was not knowing what she was going to do next.

"What lies in our power to do, it lies in our power not to do." Aristotle

How can you teach your child or students to use eye contact to
peacefully combat a bully problem or conflict situation? By giving them eye contact when talking or listening. By explaining and practicing with them till they feel comfortable implementing it and understand
how and when is the best time to use it.

Activities

1) Have two students sit face-to-face staring at one another. Make it a game by telling them that first person to move their eyes away or laughs at the other person looses the game.

2) Have a student face the class and you face them holding a pencil.
Move the pencil up and down, left and right and then to your nose so they are looking you in the eyes. When they look you in the eyes ask them some simple questions like: What is your name? What
do you like to do? Who is your hero?

If anyone has any other techniques they have used that have been successful please email it to me richard@richardpaul.com and I will share the information on our Blog: http://nobullyclub.blogspot.com.

Also we are thinking about putting together a classroom No Bully Club Membership. There would be one membership fee and cool educational items that can be distributed to the classroom. Let us know what you think.

For more information and strategies on how to reduce bullying and violence at schools and in the workplace visit our blog at:http://nobullyclub.blogspot.com or our web site at http://www.richardpaul.com.

Michigan educational/motivational speaker and author Richard Paul and his Duck Sense programs mission is to present creative, entertaining and fun school shows and youth conference keynote speeches/teen workshops that promote self-esteem, acceptance, reduce conflict and help put an end to school violence.

His school assemblies, youth workshops, motivational educational books and CDs have one common thread which is to build character, stop the bullying, understand and respect diversity and offer up success skills to help end teasing and promote anti-violence in schools.

From his many articles, to his sought after fun, character advancement, motivational audio CD "Duck Sense" and his straightforward "Tackling Conflict Head On", chapter in a new nationally recognized book entitled "The Better Bottom Line", Richard shares the success tools and techniques to help promote a safer, friendlier, happier, productive environment.

Find out more about Richard Paul at http://www.richardpaul.com

Self Esteem Issues - Their Growth and How to Overcome Them

Self esteem is how we perceive our self, the way we value our self, the worth we put on our self as a person. Although this has nothing to do with how other people perceive us, it is about how we perceive other people to perceive us.

If we suffer from low self esteem we will feel very lowly about ourselves thus filling us with self doubt. We can end up doubting everything about us, including our appearance, intelligence, capability, how much people like us and the worth of what we have to say. We can feel very lonely and different from other people.

Low self esteem can be caused by many different things. It could be bullying or constantly being put down. Someone, very often a family member, telling the person that they are not doing well enough, that they are useless or worthless or a combination of all of those things.

Whatever the cause is, it makes little, if any, difference to how the person feels. The overwhelming feelings of being a lesser person, inadequate, useless or worthless, and above all different!

This can happen at any age. Sometimes it can be in the very early, formative years of a child possibly living in the shadow of an older sibling, but could just as easily be at a much later time of life caused through a controlling relationship

These feelings can have a devastating effect on the persons life, restricting them and stopping them from going to certain places. They may avoid some activities or associating with some people for very often the unnecessary fear of being ridiculed. This can stop them from making relationships or pursuing a particular career.

Abusing somebody, be it by bullying, controlling, putting them down by telling them how useless they are, or in any other way, will understandably give that person doubts about themselves. They will think why do people treat me like that? What is it about me that make others treat me like that? There must be something wrong with me. It is these negative thoughts that are the seeds of low self esteem.

When someone has those self doubts and negative thoughts it effects how they act. They avoid situations where they might feel uncomfortable. They act in a negative way and therefore, get a negative response from others making them feel even more negative. This starts a downward cycle of feeling negative, acting negative, getting a negative response, then feeling even more negative.

How other people perceive the sufferer is of enormous importance to them. Unfortunately, what they imagine others are thinking about them will invariably be negative.

So how can we overcome low self esteem? The first thing we should remember is that it will have probably taken a long time for our self esteem to have sunk so low. Going down that spiral of negative feeling, negative actions, getting negative response, making you feel more negative. So what we need to do is become more positive in the way we feel. As negative feelings grow so do positive feelings. To many of us the thought of changing from feeling and acting negative to positive is a massive step and so it is, but the good news is all we need to do is feel a little bit more positive and then allow that feeling to grow.

The thought of changing negative thoughts to positive ones for anyone suffering from low esteem can be very daunting, but all we need to do is start the process.

I have found with my clients if they can accept the fact that they are not as important to others as they feel they are, it can very often help them to start those positive feelings. It is a fact that the only people we are important to are those who love or care for us. It is ironic that it is these people that we all feel confident and comfortable with. To all others it is unimportant what we look like, what we wear, what we say or how we act, as they are unimportant to us. If we are walking along the street and we see someone fall over or walk into a lamp post we may feel sorry for them or have a little smile, but a few steps further we have seen something in a shop window and that person has gone from our thoughts forever because there are too many other things to think about, and that is how every one reacts.

If we accept what we are like is not that important to other people we need no longer worry about what they think about us, a very positive thought. It is only a start, but very often that first small, positive thought is all that is needed to allow the growing process to begin.

Add a relaxation therapy like hypnotherapy or aromatherapy to help the sufferer become more relaxed and calm, then those feelings can start to change and that negative, downward cycle can turn into an upward, positive one.

Henry is a fully qualified hypnotherapist specialising in emotional problems. For more information on low self esteem and hypnotherapy please go to http://www.hypnotherapycounselling.com

5 Tips For Handling Conflict

If you live long enough you will experience conflict. The chance that everyone will like us or get along with us is very minimal. Inevitably we will disagree with someone. When this happens, handling the conflict with a level head avoids stress and keeps the chance of the conflict escalating less likely.

Handling conflict does not have to be confrontational in the classic sense. When someone mentions an altercation we think of the showdown at the OK Corral. Coming into the meeting ready to fight is not the best way to handle a conflict.

Conflicts can occur at any time. You could be in a grocery store and the cashier may act rude as they ring up your groceries. We've all had that happen at least once, right? The first reaction is to slam the money on the counter or to snap back at them. In that instant we have taken their problems as our own and created a stressful situation that changes the tone of the rest of our day.

Here are five tips for handling conflict. They work for coworkers, family members, friends, and even strangers. You never know when the proper response to a conflict could save your life or someone else's.

1. Think about the situation. We are quick to respond when someone says what we don't like. Take the time to breathe before responding. In that breath replay the words spoken.

2. Make the hard decision. In many cases, the conflict that arises is not the first of its kind. Harsh or offensive words or deeds could be a recurring theme in the relationship. Decide if this affiliation is worth saving or if it is time to cut the person loose. Leaving the association could result in a lost friendship, a divorce, or changing jobs. Sometimes, for our own sake, these things are better in the long run than staying in a bad relationship.

3. Wait a day. Don't respond right then. Give yourself time to talk over the situation with a trusted friend. Maybe you overreacted. Sometimes, a third party can see something that you missed in the heat of your anger. In these cases, apologize where necessary. If the consensus is that you were wronged, then bring the matter to the attention of the other person with a level head not a hot one.

4. Find a solution. A common conflict, especially among spouses could result from wanting to make a purchase that there isn't enough money for. Instead of brooding, come up with favorable solutions that could get you what you want or need. Get a second job to earn the money.

5. Apologize if you were in the wrong. Just because something is true doesn't mean that it has to be said. Telling someone that they are wearing a dress that is too small for them is not a positive way to help them lose weight. Understand how it could be offensive to them and apologize. Better yet, stop and think before you respond in situations such as these. Put yourself in the other person's shoes before hand. Part of resolving conflicts is realizing our role in it.
Facing confrontational situations is not easy. But, it is not inevitable and sometimes it has to be done. Learning conflict resolution techniques can alleviate the stress of these situations.

Gregg Zban is a General Manager with Coca-Cola Enterprises and has created a website dedicated to better time management in business, with family, at school and more.

To learn more please visit http://www.choice-time-management.com

For freebies please visit http://www.GreggZban.com

Relationship Self Help - No Pity Here

Until you are willing to realize relationship self help then there is no pity here. It's easy to run around and ask others for help. The thing is have you really sat down and taken a long hard look as to why you are in this mess in the first place. All too often people are quick to blame everything that happens on their ex. Well I think it takes two to tangle for the most part so have a look at where you went wrong in the relationship.

I have a strong desire to brush people off when they ask for advice if they haven't gone through the stage of relationship self help. That doesn't mean you have to find all the answers. It just means you need to understand where you went wrong and be able to make a commitment to changing. Once you have done then it may be time to start working on getting your ex back.

Once you have gone through the relationship self help stage then it may be time to ask for some help on changing things. If you truly believe you want to be a different person and you truly believe you have what it takes then it's time to go for it. You need to be able to understand the direction you are going and the direction you want to be going. You need to understand that all errors can't be fixed over night and lastly you need to understand that it just may be too late to get your ex back.

However with the right attitude and relationship self help you at least stand a chance of straightening things out. So before you even think about getting your ex back make sure you know why you are doing it and make sure it is for all the right reasons. Always be prepared for the worst in case you don't get the results you want. At this point it may be time to move on with your life and at least learn from your mistakes.

I have no certificates on my walls, I have no degrees from anywhere. What I do have is a lifetime of experiences to help others with their relationship issues.

I think life skills are more important than any others out there. So yes I would say I am very qualified to give advice on your relationship topics. Visiting my site is a must if you are looking at how to get back an ex.

Also I have built my site around a place where people can help others with stories, articles and questions and answers.

I look forward to seeing you at Get Back An Ex

Stop Stuttering - Help - How to Stop Stammering and Stuttering Easily

If you want to stop stuttering, help is necessary. Stuttering or stammering is a speech disorder where you repeat certain syllables or sounds while you are talking. It gives people the impression that you are uncomfortable in the situation or unsure of yourself. They can quite literally hear the fear in your voice. For this reason, many people want to quit their stammering and end the problems that it creates. A stutter is involuntary and as such it cannot be stopped by reading a troubleshooting guide or FAQ, nor can it be stopped by participating in tutorials. Instead of a tutorial, a person with a stammer needs to find another way of stopping the problem. While there is no anti - stammer medications that you can go to the shop and pick up, the solution is almost as easy as that. If you suffer from stuttering, self help and support are necessary to overcome it and hypnosis is the most effective way of achieving that goal.

How Do I Know If I Stammer?

It is often hard for people to hear their own speech imperfections. They have likely become so habitual that they are hard to recognize. However, if you routinely draw out sounds within a word or repeat syllables or sounds then you might have problem. The problem is often first recognized by a parent or teacher during one's childhood but not always.

Why Is My Speech Impaired?

Scientists and doctors are not sure what causes this particular speech impairment. It might have something to do with language development in the brain or it might be a result of teasing or low self confidence during childhood. The cause is not as important as recognizing that you have a problem and fixing it. The solution to the problem is not at all dependent on the initial cause.

Is My Speech Holding Me Back?

If you have a speech impairment such as stammering it is likely holding you back whether you are in school or in the workforce. Other people hear uncertainty and anxiety in your voice and make the often erroneous conclusion that you do not know what you are talking about.

Now, imagine what the difference would be in how others perceive you if you spoke clearly and confidently. People would not be distracted by your speech and would instead listen to the words that you were saying. You would be more respected and better able to communicate your point of view which often will get you what you want.

Do You Want to Stop? Stuttering Help is Possible

Self hypnosis recordings can help you end your speech impairment once and for all. The recordings target your subconscious and change the message that your brain has been sending your voice for most of your life.

Hypnosis is a Good Solution

Hypnosis is a noninvasive solution that will not cause any side effects. The recordings allow you to change a life long habit quickly and from the comfort of your own home. You will not have to endure countless and expensive sessions with speech pathologists or psychologists. If you want to stop stuttering, help through hypnosis is possible and often the most effective method available.

J. Seymour is a writer with Self Help Recordings. 'Stop Stuttering' is an excellent recording by Steve G Jones, who offers twenty years of experience through these recordings. To find out more, visit Stop Stuttering Help. A range of other self hypnosis products can be found here - Stuttering Self Help. All of the recordings on Self Help Recordings are backed by an impressive sixty day guarantee, so to find out more simply click on the links.

Positive Thinking - Self Help Tips

I am a huge advocate of positive thinking. I apply it in every aspect of my life. But lately, I have been wondering, is all this positive thinking starting to cloud my judgment? Am I so focused on the positive that I am just not in touch with reality anymore? When does positive thinking become delusion?

It all started about two weeks ago when I started to have a dangerous moment of self reflection. If someone asked me at that point, 'Are you happy with your life?' I would have said 'Sure, pretty much'. I would like to be less busy, I would like to have a bit more time, I would like to see my friends more, but generally, I am pretty positive about where I am with life. The problem is that then I started to question whether that positive feeling was in fact justified, or was it simply a state of mind.

So, I started to examine the facts, which is even more dangerous than self reflection! I started to look at my life as it stands and compared it with how I wanted it to be. I mentally skipped through every aspect of my life; relationship, friends, family, work and self. At the end of it all, low and behold, I wasn't feeling very positive anymore. It was actually a fairly sad and dreary tale.

Now don't get my wrong. I am not saying that everything in my life is awful or that there is nothing good that is happening for me. But, when I looked at where I am and where I wanted to be, there was a pretty big gap between the two. So, for someone that thought life was pretty good and easy, I was suddenly forced to consider that perhaps it was not.

Firstly, I thought about whether my goals were realistic or just down right ludicrous and some did not pass the test. If I did everything that I wanted to, I would never sleep and even then would struggle to get through it all, which resulted in reestablishing my expectations. But, even after that, I realized that there were parts of my life that I wanted to believe were amazing and fantastic, but when I looked at the cold hard truth, were a far cry from what I wanted them to be. For all my focusing on the positive, I had failed to see that the negatives were actually things that mattered to me and simply ignoring them would not make them go away. In this case, I had been so hell-bent on looking at the positive; I was deluding myself and damaging my life along the way.

Armed with this new awareness, I have since been forced to conduct a major review and the outcome continues to remain unknown. And, (surprise, surprise), I feel pretty positive about it! As I said, I am a huge fan of positive thinking. It can be the difference between amazing or ordinary, sparkling or flat. I truly believe that it is a conscious choice and way of life that drives satisfaction and well-being. But used in the wrong way, as I have now learned, it can result in misguided choices and poor direction.

I have absolutely no idea what the answers are for me right now. I am in a fairly confused state as a result of all of this turmoil. However I do believe that I will make all my dreams come true one way or the other, and that is something to feel positive about. So with that in mind, I will continue to bubble along and try to remember my important lesson. Stay positive, but do not lose sight of what is real!

find4me has been created to make it simpler and easier to manage your health and wellbeing. We provide practical information about what health and wellbeing services are available and finding those that are right for you. To read more articles like this one or suggest a topic of interest, just visit our blog

find4me was founded by Kareene Koh and is based around her passion for health and well-being. To find out more about find4me please visit http://www.find4me.com.au

Becoming the Old Woman Full of Wisdom

A woman in society is a very interesting creature. She is a sign of beauty and all the male people want to be associated with her. In the life of a woman, there are many stages. First, there is the beginning stage, when she is born. The female child is a blessing in most societies of the world. Today, their arrival is celebrated as they are ushered into the real world. The girl child will then develop as they reach a stage where information and understanding comes to them. After this, they will enter into a stage where they will start to discover the opposite sex and the power of attraction. This is a crucial stage and many girls do things their bodies have never done. It is the verge of adulthood, however strange and confusing, the lady will enjoy every minute because it is a gateway to new and exciting things until she becomes the old woman. From this stage, the lady will start to look more keenly at the opposite sex as they look out for a person who could be destined for them.

It does not take long before a young man comes calling and depending on the feelings of the lady, she will either accept or deny. When a girl is treated with love and respect from an attractive man, it is very easy for them to say yes. The next transition might be marriage if everything goes well. This is the stage where the girl becomes a woman. They say that this is the stage where ladies learn most. The wisdom will last until they are referred to as the old woman. Life will be based on this institution which is called marriage and a lot comes from it. Children and even wealth of many sorts will come to a woman at this stage. She is not yet the old woman. Sometimes, there will be feelings of inadequacies but, they will pass and if the partners are still committed to the marraige it will last. The woman will then learn to harbor great wisdom that will seek to direct her children. Sometimes, she will be shocked at the fact that a lot of sense comes from her mouth. She will just see herself as the young girl who was mesmerized by the thought of having her own home. At time, she will feel like the old woman but, it is not yet time for that.

A dry season might set in and the husband might begin to change. They will engage in all business that is strange and, people will refer to it as mid life crisis. This crisis will not spare the woman. She will have to undergo her fair share of challenges as she recounts all those dreams she has not yet fulfilled. But at this stage, the children are grown up and some are leaving home. She will be feeling like the old woman. When the kids mature up, little things will not worry her anymore, she is happy observing the success of her children. At some point, the grand children will start to beckon and, she is the old woman. She will be the source of wisdom and guidance to her children. Her words are invaluable. Years of experience have taught her all she needs to know about life. She is the mature older woman. It is pretty exciting going through the journeys of life knowing that you have no regrets.

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There is No Substitute For Working Your Proverbial Butt Off

Those of us who immerse ourselves in the Self Help industry throw around great-sounding buzz words all day: Action, Achievement, Confidence, Determination, Enthusiasm, Perseverance (we love that one), Wisdom, Zeal, etc. Check it out, I'm so in love with these words, I even capitalize them as though they are proper names.

Just cannot keep my Zeal in check.

However, there is one thing - in our Haste - that we often neglect to touch on. One thing that, if overlooked, will render every capitalized buzz word in our vocabulary ineffective. This one thing is HARD WORK. Good, old fashioned, get down and dirty, hard work.

You can have all the intelligence, education, common sense, self confidence, and, yes, Perseverance, in the world. But if you are not willing to roll up your sleeves and work, it will all be for naught. Things that are worth having seldomly just fall into our laps. Promotions at work, increased traffic on websites, larger paychecks - they are all things we want very much to familiarize ourselves with. Waiting for them to magically materialize, however, will just lead to disappointment.

WRITE IT OUT AND WORK IT OUT:

Think of three things you want in life. Whether they are personal or professional in nature does not matter. In fact, if you are like most of us, you will have a mixture of the two. At the top of a piece of paper, write (in all capital letters), DREAMS, then divide your paper, horizontally, into thirds. Give each third a number, 1 through 3.

Beside each number, write one specific thing you want to bring about in your life. The more specific you can be, the better. You would no't tell your daughter, as she heads out for a date, Sweetie, be home sometime this evening. Heck no! You say, Be back before 11:00. Specific. Definite. No wiggle room. Treat yourself the same way. No wiggle room.

If there is one thing you can say about humans it is this: We know our way around wiggle rooms and can take advantage of them every single time.

Below each specific desire, create a numbered work list of things you need to do to work toward success. For example, if Increased traffic for my blog is one of your three desires, your work list may look something like this:

1. Write and submit 1 article each evening to Ezine Articles.
2. Contact 5 similar blogs each week asking for link exchanges.
3. Visit 3 blogs each morning, before work. Leave related, useful comments, along with my link.
4. Visit 3 different blogs each evening, before bed. Leave related, useful comments, along with my link.

Again, as with the desires themselves, when you are creating your numbered work list, be extremely specific. Our mind responds to specifics much better than it does to generalities.

The Very Important Final Step:

Now, go back to the top and scratch out DREAMS. Write GOALS beside it, and never think of these desires as dreams again. They're GOALS, and they're very much within reach. You just have to work for them.

As someone once said, "Self isn't something one finds, it's something one creates." Self Help Daily would love to help YOU create a masterpiece!

What Makes A Great Presenter?

Every day millions of people around the world make a presentation. Yet most of us who have been to meetings know that very few of those people are truly great. At each meeting there is usually only one person who stands out head and shoulders above the rest as someone who really connects with us in the audience. The truth is, most presenters are just plain average and quite a few are simply dreadful. So, how can you move from being a run of the mill presenter to being fantastic?

Every one of us has the ability to be truly great as a presenter. There is nothing particularly special about the people who stand out as brilliant. However, the average presenter is usually holding themselves back, doing things which prevent them from being good.

At every training course run by The Presentation Business we spend some time debating what makes a great presenter. This inevitably leads to a discussion of what the bad presenters do wrong. Having kept a record of what these sessions considered I have been able to produce a definitive list of what to do to make your presentations great.

The overwhelming conclusion of all these discussions is: content is NOT important. Of the hundreds of people who have debated what makes a great presenter not a single person has mentioned the value of the content. Your audiences are likely to think in just the same way. They are NOT interested in what you are saying, but the way you are saying it. If you say it well, that appears to make the content interesting. But what this means is, if you concentrate your planning and preparation on content, you are likely only to be average.

The most important factor for great presenters according to our discussions is that they make a personal connection to every member of the audience. This means lots of eye contact, liberal use of the words I and you, and that everything you deliver is done form the audiences perspective. This means you need to know a great deal about your audience in advance so you can do this.

The connection you make between yourself and your audience seems to be enhanced by the widespread use of examples. Our discussions at training courses show that your audience expects you to show rather than tell. In other words, you dont need to give them messages and content; instead you need to give them lots of examples and they will work out the message for themselves.

A further element of this aspect of being a great presenter is that these examples should always include you. Your audience wants to know about your thoughts, your feelings and your opinions. They want to share your experiences. If all you deliver is content, this does not help your audience. They could get your content from a book, a web site or some other non human contact. The fact that you are presenting to them means your audience wants to hear from you personally.

Your audience also wants you to be a living person. They dont want to hear from a statue. In other words you need to be active. The discussions held at our training courses show time and time again that presenters who move are the one who gain the most attention. If you think about this, it is quite understandable. In social situations we are active we use gestures, we move our bodies and change posture. To avoid doing so when presenting makes you look abnormal and this serves to disconnect you. There is also a big advantage to moving it helps reduce nerves when presenting.

As well as moving to be natural, our discussions show that great presenters are interactive. They ask questions, they involve the audience and essentially they treat the presentation as a conversation. This helps boost the connection between themselves and the audience. Thats because for the audience the interactivity appears normal, whereas being spoken at for a great length of time does not.

Another important aspect of making your presentation appear normal is that your audience expects you to deliver your material without any prompts. Conversations do not need notes! Hence your presentation will benefit from appearing normal if you do not use notes or any prompts of any kind including bullet points on slides. Discussions at our training sessions show time and time again that audiences do not like presenters who use notes, prompt cards, bullet point slides or any other form of memory jogger. Audiences expect presenters to know their stuff. Great presenters never use notes.

An extension of the lack of notes concept is that great presenters talk from the heart. They are passionate about their subject and they are emotional. The dispassionate, business-like presenter is one of the most disliked, according to our discussions. What this means is that you should talk less about your subject and much more about your experiences as this will help boost your passion.

Our training sessions also reveal that audiences want to have fun. They want to see you enjoying yourself and they want to have a laugh. This does not mean you need to tell jokes, but it does mean your audiences expect you to be light. Even for serious subjects it seems that audiences expect some kind of lightness. They want humour and they want you to smile. Straight faced, dry presenters are particularly disliked by audiences.

One final aspect that is revealed by the discussions at our training sessions and that is everyone in your audience expects the presenter to motivate them. This does not mean you need to be a motivational speaker. Rather what it means is that your audience is expecting you to tell them what to do. Your audience does not expect a presenter simply to deliver information they can get that from a book or a web site. Instead great presenters give audiences some action to take.

All of these discussion points suggest that those presenters who treat their presentation as a conversation who just have a chat with the audience are the ones marked out as truly great. People who give presentations by delivering content are seen as boring and uninteresting. This also means their messages are not conveyed, so they may as well not be presenting in the first place.

Oh, and one final thing. Our discussions show that audiences simply detest the use of computerised slides. They just want to hear from you. Truly great presenters therefore do one other vital thing they switch off the projector!

Graham Jones runs The Presentation Business at http://www.presentationbiz.com which specialises in helping people become great public speakers.